Weekly Chasidic Story #939 (s5776-11 / 11 Kislev 5776)

A Swift Solution

"I mean what I say. A promise is a promise," replied the Lubavitcher Rebbe.

Connection: Weekly Reading -- which begins: "Yaakov sent messengers" (to his estranged brother).

A Swift Solution

He was a gifted and highly successful teacher in a major Jewish school system--a teacher whose students preferred his classes to summer vacation. Even on their bar mitzvah day his students wouldn't budge from his classes, taking advantage of the hours before the festivities to learn Torah. The struggle between parents urging their sons' attendance at prestigious summer camps, and students wishing to continue learning with their beloved teacher, was a yearly event.

Once, at the bar-mitzvah of one of his students, as the official festivities drew to a close, a spontaneous chassidic farbrengen (get-together) began to take shape. Not long after, one of the guests turned to the teacher and asked, "Are you connected to the Rebbe?" And in that warm and sincere atmosphere prevailing at farbrengens, no special urging was required for the teacher to open up...and to share his yechidus with the Lubavitcher Rebbe 30 years ago, an event transcending time.

* * *

I was married in 1960, and soon afterward began working as a teacher. In the course of time I became very close to a Chabad chasid, Rabbi M.A, who was living in the same city at the time. We would study together twice a week, Gemara and Tanya. And as our friendship deepened, he became not only a study partner, but also a confidant, a person to whom I could open my heart for help and advice. Little did I know then that this relationship would leave its mark on my whole life.

Two years had passed meanwhile since my marriage, and we were not yet granted the blessing of children. On the suggestion of acquaintances, we considered a medical solution and made an appointment with a prominent specialist. His prognosis after our visit: there was no hope. Greatly distressed we then consulted with an additional specialist who, in light of the first doctor's test results, steered us toward alternative medicine and wished us good luck.

I had made a personal request from the second doctor: since the earlier examination results caused my wife such anguish, would he please - no matter what the present examination indicated - be gentle and reassuring with my wife. He could tell me privately afterwards what was happening. He preferred not to honor my request, and instead, painted for her the most depressing picture possible; how serious the condition was. We left for home utterly destroyed.

Meanwhile I had been relating all the events to my dear friend, M.A. The truth is, he had already counseled me to see the Rebbe, the first time he heard of our difficulties. However, for various reasons, I had evaded his suggestion. This time, though, after suffering through the second doctor, his words fell on eager ears. Our conversation now was technicalities: asking the Secretariat to arrange a yechidus (private audience), and arranging lodging in the Crown Heights district of Brooklyn.

Our appointment was arranged for Thursday evening. Arriving in Crown Heights, we were surprised to learn that we wouldn't be able to enter the Rebbe's room before midnight. We walked into "770" as the clock neared midnight, and surveying the number of people who were waiting to enter before us. It was clear that our turn wouldn't come before even more hours had passed. Exhausted, we considered heading back to our lodgings for the night. Then one of those in turn, hearing our deliberations about abandoning our turn, confronted us directly. "How can you think of such a thing?" he asked earnestly. "I'm also wiped out. I've come from Australia only for the purpose of yechidus, and I'm returning home right after Shabbos. And you - after you've come not nearly so far - what a pity to lose this opportunity..."

His words strengthened us and we sat down to wait. At a quarter to three in the morning we entered the Rebbe's room, and I gave him our note detailing the situation, requesting his blessing and advice what to do. The Rebbe asked us for additional details about the treatments we had already been through, and whether we had done a particular test. When I replied that Yes, we had, the Rebbe asked in astonishment how could I have twice permitted such a painful and agonizing examination?

I answered innocently that I had felt I had no choice - the doctors had advised me both the first and second time.

Then the Rebbe said: It's possible to continue with the treatments, but - regarding the examinations - it's advisable to carry out only blood tests and the like. Avoid repeating any of the tests accompanied by serious physical discomfort. It was clear that the Rebbe was dissatisfied with the doctors' care.

Now all this time, although I was deeply moved as well as fatigued, I forced myself to be alert; to maintain my clear thinking...until the Rebbe's next words stunned me: "Before you married your wife, were you engaged to someone else?" His words were in a tone that might have been a question; but might also have been a statement of fact. The Rebbe continued: "And perhaps you also gave her some gift..." Overcome by emotion, I couldn't speak; I simply nodded my agreement.

Again the Rebbe addressed me and asked: "And did you receive her forgiveness after the engagement was broken off?!" I replied that No, I hadn't sought her forgiveness. What I did was explain carefully why our paths were separating, and in what direction I was heading.

"That's not enough," said the Rebbe, "You must obtain her forgiveness! And when she does that, she'll receive a release from her own difficulties; and everything will work out properly."

I asked the Rebbe how I should ask her forgiveness: should I approach her directly? "No. Find a representative to ask on your behalf, and he should undertake this together with someone else."

I asked, "Since forgiveness is a matter of the heart, how shall I know that she pardons me with her whole heart?" The Rebbe answered, "Tell her in my name - through your representative - that if she agrees and forgives with her whole heart, then I promise her that she will soon find her future husband, her engagement will follow swiftly, and she will be married shortly afterwards and build a family!"

I have to be honest: it was very hard for me to digest these words. It was too much to believe. Unable to restrain my amazement, I asked: can the Rebbe be using the word Promise?

The Rebbe's reply: "I mean what I say. A promise is a promise."

I wanted to fulfill the Rebbe's instructions immediately upon leaving his room. I located my former fiancee's brother, and on that Saturday night, two days after our yechidus - I telephoned him and related the Rebbe's words. At first he demurred, relenting to consider the matter only after I suggested he call up the Rebbe's secretaries to verify what I was telling him.

In the end I persuaded him to speak with his sister, and I requested that he be my agent to ask her forgiveness. I mentioned the Rebbe's instructions that the forgiveness should be in the presence of an additional person, and I agreed with his suggestion that his wife could play that role. But the main point, I asked him, is to carry out my request fully and as quickly as possible; and emphasize to her the Rebbe's message - that the forgiveness be with a full heart, as well as his extraordinary promise.

Her brother startled me at the close of our conversation. "Look," he said, "Once every number of months she stays with us for Shabbos, and she's here now. Stay on the line, and I'll ask her." And minutes later he informed me, "Yes: she agrees, and forgives you completely!"

The next day we returned home, and to our life - filled with hope and trust in the Rebbe's blessing.

Early in the morning three weeks later, the phone rang. It was. Mrs. A. "You know what? She is engaged!"

Still half-asleep I didn't understand right away. "Who are you talking about?" I asked her.

Then the thunderbolt struck. My former fiancee! The Rebbe's promise had actualized with lightning speed. And Yes, his promise is a promise...Their marriage was four weeks later
.
What more is there to say? Only that in those very days - and I mean in those days that she became engaged, my wife conceived.

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Source: Adapted by Yerachmiel Tilles from the translation into English by Tuvia Natkin for Kfar Chabad Magazine.

Connection: Weekly Reading-which begins: "Yaakov sent messengers" (to his estranged brother).

Biographical note:
Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneerson, the Lubavitcher Rebbe: [11 Nissan 5662 - 3 Tammuz 5754 (April 1902 - June 1994 C.E.)], became the seventh Rebbe of the Chabad dynasty after his father-in-law's passing on 10 Shvat 5710 (1950 C.E.). He is widely acknowledged as the greatest Jewish leader of the second half of the 20th century. Although a dominant scholar in both the revealed and hidden aspects of Torah and fluent in many languages and scientific subjects, the Rebbe is best known for his extraordinary love and concern for every Jew on the planet. His emissaries around the globe dedicated to strengthening Judaism number in the thousands. Hundreds of volumes of his teachings have been printed, as well as dozens of English renditions.

Yerachmiel Tilles is co-founder and associate director of Ascent-of-Safed, and chief editor of this website (and of KabbalaOnline.org). He has hundreds of published stories to his credit, and many have been translated into other languages. He tells them live at Ascent nearly every Saturday night.

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