Weekly Chasidic Story #936 (s5776-08 / 20 Mar-Cheshvan 5776)

The First Match

He told Rabbi Moshe-Zvi of Sevran about the difficulties he was having finding a wife. Because he was a poor Torah scholar and a widow, no one would offer him a match.

Connection: Weekly Reading - Finding a Match

 

The First Match

A recently-widowed chasid named Meir walked and tramped for many days in order to spend the festivals in the court of his Rebbe, Rabbi Moshe-Zvi of Sevran. When it was time to take leave and he was admitted to the Rebbe's room, he told about the difficulties he was having finding a wife. Because he was a poor Torah scholar and a widow, no one wanted him.

"Go in peace," said the Rebbe, blessing him. "I advise you to accept the first marriage proposition that is suggested to you." He also gave him a bit of money for the trip.

On his way home the chasid decided to stay the night in a village inn. In the dining area he found a group of loafers with nothing better to do than wasting their time in drinking and foolish jesting. Being cold from his journey, and not wanting to socialize, he found a seat in a corner next to the stove. He tried to be unobtrusive, but the mischief-makers spotted him right away and asked him where he was from and what was his business. He gave them the name of his home town, and told them that he had just visited the Rebbe of Sevran.

"What did you want from the Rebbe, and what did he answer you?" they pried.

Meir naively told them everything: "I asked the Rebbe to pray that the Al-mighty arrange that I meet my marriage partner, and he told me that I should agree to the first match that was proposed to me."

At this, one of the party jumped up and exclaimed: "Excellent! I have a first-class match for you. My sister is a young divorcee, very nice, and she happens to be in the kitchen, right now! Wait here and I'll tell her. Then I'll bring her out, and if you are agreeable, we can shake hands on it."

Now in fact this good-for-nothing was in no way related to the young woman; she was the daughter of the wealthy innkeeper, who was not in town at the time.

The prankster ran into the kitchen, explained the joke to her and asked her to play her role, saying it would be excellent for the inn's business, as many celebratory drinks would certainly be ordered. She innocently agreed, and followed her 'brother' out into the main room where he introduced pair to each other.

"Nu, Rabbi, what do you say?" asked the smiling matchmaker.

Meir answered coolly: "Fine; I agree."

All present greeted his decision with loud cheers and applause. Many ordered vodka with which to treat the chasid on the occasion of his unconventional engagement, and had a great time toasting l'chaim and offering him their blessings, all the while snickering behind his back.

After a while, when the boisterousness had begun to die down, one of the loiterers came up with a further suggestion: "Why don't we arrange the marriage ceremony straight away? Then we can throw a really tremendous party!"

Someone else at his table objected: "But none of our crowd knows how to draw up the marriage contract and conduct the ceremony."

"What a pity. We could have had such a great time."

Meir, overhearing them, promptly volunteered that he knew both to write the ketubah and supervise the chupah. This unexpected participation by the religious sucker gave them even more cause for mirth. They took a clean tablecloth and held it up with four broomsticks over the heads of the couple as a chupah canopy. The chasid wrote out the ketubah document; and then with the inexpensive ring that someone cheerfully donated to him, he duly sanctified the giggling young lady as his lawful wedded wife "according to the religion of Moses and Israel."

All the inn's customers shouted "Mazal tov! Mazal tov, chatan v'kallah (bride and groom)." The groom was promptly hoisted onto the shoulders of the drunken celebrants, who bounced him up and down and twirled him around. They enjoyed their practical joke so much that after they lowered him down they tugged at his hat and long robe from all sides, made fun of him without any restraint, and even started to slap him around a bit.

Seeing how things were faring for him, the new bridegroom decided that even though it was his wedding night, it would be wise to make his escape. He snuck away and was able to arrange to sleep in the cottage of one of the gentile villagers.

In the morning he carefully crossed the threshold of the inn, wary despite the unlikelyhood that his persecutors of the nght before be already up and about. Instead he saw a well-dressed man on the other side of the room with his back to him. He asked one of the servants, who confirmed that this was indeed the owner of the inn and that his name was Zvi Velbka.

The young man approached the innkeeper, and said, "Good morning, father-in-law!"

The innkeeper was shocked at being called 'father-in-law' by this obviously impoverished and unemployed scholar. "Who are you? What are you talking about?" he demanded.

"I married your daughter last night," responded Meir quietly.

The innkeeper shouted for his daughter to come out of the kitchen. Seeing her "chatan" and how upset her father was, she quickly explained: "This young man has been providing us with a little entertainment. Last night we made believe and had a engagement party and marriage ceremony, just for fun! You'll be pleased with how much extra food and liquor was sold."

Her father did not like the sound of what he heard, and plied her with questions in order to find out exactly what had taken place. When he heard her answers, he burst out, "Oh,no! You silly girl!" Turning to Meir he shouted furiously, "Chutzpan (impudent one)! How dare you play along with those idiots. They may not understand the implications of a ketubah and a wedding ceremony in front of witnesses, but if you are a chasid and a scholar as you appear, you should certainly have known that to do so constitutes a legally binding marriage under Torah law. Didn't you realize that they were making fun of you? I demand that you divorce my daughter immediately!"

To make his point clearer, he slapped the chasid across the face. Meir neither moved nor spoke; he simply shook his head 'No.'

Mr. Velbka quickly realized that he had taken the wrong appoach. " If I stay angry, he'll continue to take no notice of me," he thought to himself. "Since I'm already tied up with this pathetic pauper, I'll have to speak to him politely in order to be able to get out of this mess."

He therefore changed his tone, asked Meir to give his daughter a bill of divorce, and promised him twenty silver rubles for his trouble, a significant amount of money. To his surprise, the chasid quickly refused. He doubled and redoubled his offer, but each time with the same lack of success.

"You might as well stop trying to buy me off," said Meir finally. "Let me tell you what is really going on. My Rebbe told me to agree to the first match that was proposed to me, and that's what I did. Anyway, she seemed to be a pleasant young woman, and of good character. This crowd may have treated the whole matter as a joke, but I took it seriously. I accepted the offer, according to the Rebbe's instructions, and I certainly will not withdraw from the marriage without a specific order to do so from the Rebbe."

Upon discovering that they were both chasidim of the same Rebbe, the innkeeper said, Fine. Let us go to Sevran together and whatever he says we shall do."

When they arrived, Zvi Velbka put his complaint to the Maggid: "Last night, while I was away from home, along came this bum, believed a band of jokers who told him my daughter was their sister, and accepted their proposal to marry her. Then he himself wrote a ketubah and gave her a ring under the wedding canopy in front of witnesses! I want to dissolve it and I offered him some money to do so, but he won't agree without your approval. I am now willing to offer him one hundred silver rubles-a fortune for him-so long as he gives my daughter a divorce."

"If you will to retire to your lodgings," said the Rebbe, "I'll discuss the matter with Rabbi Meir."

When the innkeeper returned a few hours later, the Maggid told him: "I discussed the divorce with the chatan, and he is agreeable -- provided that you give him a thousand silver rubles. I will then propose an excellent respectable match that I have in mind for your daughter. The new bridegroom will bring a thousand silver rubles to supplement the dowry, so really you will lose nothing at all."

The innkeeper quickly agreed, but said that he needed a few days to prepare the sum. The Rebbe smiled and said that he also needed additional time to arrange a scribe and two witnesses.

They agreed to meet again in a week's time. Velbka returned to his inn while Meir remained in Sevran at the Rebbe's request.

The Rebbe acted quickly. Borrowing three hundred rubles he set about to transform the appearance of the young groom. With a haircut, a new suit and an elegant shtreimel [round hat of fur and velvet worn by Chasidim on Shabbat and special occeasions], Meir seemed a different person. He impressed everyone with his fine appearance and intelligent mien.

When Mr. Velbka arrived, money in hand, to complete the divorce, the Rebbe took him aside and whispered: "I have found the perfect match for your daughter." They walked into the Beit Midrash (study hall), where the Rebbe pointed to the renovated Meir, who was sitting in front of a large tome of Talmud, studying it with another chasid.

Velbka was duly impressed with the young man's sophisticated appearance. Not recognizing him at all, he agreed that this could very well be a suitable match. The Rebbe then revealed the truth; this was, in fact, the man his daughter's had already married.

Reb Tzvi's face fell, but he said nothing. The Rebbe spoke further: "I have heard from heaven that this match has been decreed. You, however, were supposed to have lost your entire fortune, and so been forced to take this match. When I prayed on your behalf I succeeded in averting that part of the verdict."

"I am willing to do whatever you say, Rebbe," said the awed innkeeper.

"Very well," asserted Rabbi Moshe-Zvi. "I vouch that this man comes from a family of excellent lineage, and is himself an accomplished Torah scholar and a refined person of outstanding character. The only negative is his poverty.

"Now, thank G-d, he has a thousand silver rubles. A proper good diet will further improve his appearance. You could do no better than to continue with him. I assure you: it is a match made in heaven. May you both journey home with joyful hearts."

The innkeeper took the Rebbe's counsel to heart, and happily brought his son-in-law home with him. The newly wedded couple lived many happy and prosperous years together, and were frequent visitors to the court of the Rebbe of Sevran.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Source: Adapted by Yerachmiel Tilles mostly from A Treasury of Chassidic Tales (Artscroll), but with variant and added details from other written and oral sources. (Zevin -see #263 in this email series--records it in the name of a different Rebbe, without names of the two Chasidim, and with it taking only one visit to the Rebbe by the innkeeper.)

Biographical note: Rabbi Moshe-Zvi Giterman of Sevran [of blessed memory: 5535 - 27 Tevet 5597 (1775 - Dec. 1837 C.E.)] was a disciple of his father, whom he succeeded as Maggid of Savran in 1802, and of Rabbi Levi Yitzchak of and Rabbi Boruch of Mezhibuz. He later became the Rabbi of Berditchev after the passing of Rabbi Levi Yitzchak in 1810, and subsequently of the towns of Uman and Kishinev as well. He had thousands of chasidim. His Torah insights were collected and printed in the book, Likutey Shoshanim.

Connection: Weekly Reading - Finding a match.


Yerachmiel Tilles is co-founder and associate director of Ascent-of-Safed, and chief editor of this website (and of KabbalaOnline.org). He has hundreds of published stories to his credit, and many have been translated into other languages. He tells them live at Ascent nearly every Saturday night.

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